Hospitality and simple kindnesses
September 14, 2007(Discussion between GB and Nahomi)
Dear Daddy,
While the Bible tells us very clearly that His kingdom and spiritual matters are the most important for us, it also clearly shows that we are not to be lacking in social graces such as hospitality and simple kindnesses.
Let me just write about this social aspect:
If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless. Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world. (James 1:26-27)
To be kindly in speech, to be kind to the widow and the orphan, to be helpful when someone dies or when there is sickness in the home, to call people over for a meals, to be kind and polite, to look after aged parents, to care for one’s wife and kids, to be respectful to one’s husband, these are social graces that even the ungodly do to some extent. For Christians, developing such qualities is not optional.
These are things that we cannot overlook or cheat on, like some Jews did during the time of the Lord on earth.“But you say, `If a man says to his father or mother, “Whatever profit you might have received from me is Corban”-’ (that is, a gift to God), then you no longer let him do anything for his father or his mother, making the word of God of no effect through your tradition which you have handed down. And many such things you do.” (Mark 7:11-13) These grown children were neglecting their parents and saying that whatever the would have spent on their parents, they have now offered to God. According to them, because of this, they were now free from their obligations.
An EBA son or an EBA daughter will be a better son or a better daughter in all matters save in participating in godless preoccupations of the family. He will not be unkind or disrespectful. If a member of the family is sick, it is the EBA son who will be most helpful. And in spite of all this, we may find that he is not that loved in return. That is OK. It is thus much harder to be an EBA son in a family. It is the EBA wife’s submissive attitude that will win the husband over. It is only through EBA member that those people may ever get a taste of God. So I think we must be more kind and more hospitable than others.
Common human kindness is something that we must have. In India, we take people around us for granted, the bus driver, the auto-rickshaw driver, the watchman, the cleaners, the booking clerk, and so on. An EBA person must not raise his voice when speaking to these or anyone else for that matter. Our behavior outside the church must ALSO be a good example.
Inviting church members for a meal, etc, is a grace that women must develop. Such social gatherings among believers will never be worldly. They need not be forced spiritual occasions either. In times when a home has suffered a bereavement or sickness, we must be prominently present. I really feel we lack in these common graces.
Romans 12 shows that the priority are spiritual things. But some have the gift of hospitality and cheerfulness and prayer and generosity and these ought to be encouraged.
so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, let us prophesy in proportion to our faith; or ministry, let us use it in our ministering; he who teaches, in teaching; he who exhorts, in exhortation; he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.
Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another; not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer; distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality. (Romans 12: 5-13)
Let A = doctrine based on the word of God
Let B = social graces,
Without A, one cannot be in heaven
Without B, one may go to heaven.
But God’s will is that we develop A without neglecting B.
This is somewhat like what Jesus said: “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith. These you ought to have done, without leaving the others undone. (Mat 23:23)
Dear Selvi
Along with all the kindness of the type that you are gifted to show to people, we should be very cautious about the following restriction also.
A church is not a social organization although it has some social aspects and obligations to it. To be in heaven, it will not be sufficient to show our love to people, especially its members. We need to see that they fulfill the conditions to be in heaven. I know many nice people–real, real nice and adorable people, who will clearly not be in heaven, because they did not conform to the stipulations set down in the word of God. This is the sad truth although it is very unpleasant even to think of it. You must always bear this point in mind.
That is my struggle in EBA. We must all put our heads together and find out ways and means of doing that. To show meaningful love to our members is first of all to present correct doctrine, correct pedagogging, correct observance of Lord’s Supper, that will allow for healthy growth and progress from one glory to the next.
Stressing on the social aspect by itself may be pleasant and popular. But only if it is backed up with doctrine based on the word of God will it be meaningful. Should we not strive for this? If A is the doctrinal aspect and B is the social aspect, one may go to heaven if one had A without B, albeit by the skin of one’s teeth. But B with out A has no merit in the heavenward path. But A with B together will be glorious. Let us strive towards such a level.
